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 The Dumped dot com articles
Should You Take Your Ex Back?
By Christine Akiteng
The break up was sudden, you weren’t
prepared for it. Even the reason he gave for breaking up with you doesn’t
really register because everything seemed to be going on wonderfully. Okay,
you have had a few hard times, but every one of those times, you’ve
been able to work things out, so why not this time? Did he really love you?
Is there someone else?
Weeks, months have passed since he
dumped you. You realize you can survive without him. You are finally adjusting
to being single again and starting to truly heal. You get rid of all those
photos you took together, the ones you did not rip up the first few days
after he told you it was over. You also get rid of all the other stuff that
remind you of him. You are beginning to enjoy life again even going out with
your best friend. You notice men are taking interest in you and it feels
really good.
One day the phone rings, you pick
it up and it’s your ex! “It’s me" he says, “please
don’t hang up". Or you suddenly run into him at a party or grocery store.
He begs you to hear him out. And being the good person you are, you give
him a few minutes. He tells you he realizes dumping you was a terrible mistake.
He misses you and feels lonely without you. He loves you and hopes that you
will give him a second chance. This time he says will be different. What
do you do?
Scenario one: You tell the creep to
go back to where he emerged from and immediately hang up the phone or walk
away. The phone call or encounter reminds you how terrible you felt when
he dumped you. You thought your life was over, he probably hoped that you’d
die from the break up. And now here he comes crawling back into your life.
You feel angry and sad all over again - more angry than sad, perhaps.
 |
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Scenario two: You feel angry but a
part of you wants to know why he dumped you in the first place. So you ask
the questions and he answers. Not satisfactory, but at least you have answers
that you did not have before. You know in your heart that second-time-round
love can be very risky, but what if you are wrong. So you ask him for time
to think things through.
Scenario three: You hear him out but
your mind is made up. He says he is willing to change but you think it’s
all talk. You can’t trust him to stick around and can’t afford
another heart break, not again. The past is just that...in the past FOR A
REASON.
Scenario four: All the memories of
the wonderful times you had together suddenly come flooding your mind. Even
though he hurt you – a lot – you still miss him. A part of you
still loves him. And like from nowhere you remember that phrase “if
you love someone set them free, if they come back it was meant to be."
What do you do when an ex comes crawling
back?
He wants you to forgive him, that’s
fine. Tell him its all right you will forgive him not because he deserves
it but because you do. Whether or not you want to get back doesn’t matter,
forgiving him is taking back your power and intentionally refusing the past
to dictate your future. Second-time-round relationships do work, sometimes.
But for it to work you’ll have to go in feeling stronger than before.
Go into this with your eyes open and with a strong spirit.
Know What You Want
Think about it: despite who actually
did the dumping, there were reasons. When someone dumps you, it did not happen
just like that or just because you had one bad argument. Chances are that
it took him a lot of thinking to go through with it. He probably even played
out different ways of doing it before he decided it was time to dump you.
Do not let him off the hook that easy. If you let him walk in and out of
your life just like that, you are devaluing yourself and telling him he has
the right to treat you anyway he wants. This is an opportunity for you to
look at the relationship from an outsider’s perspective since you are
not in the relationship anymore. Were you happy in the relationship to begin
with? It is easy to remember all of the good times and totally forget about
all of the bad things because you have an emotional void that you need to
fill. Don’t ignore the red flags and don’t trust too soon.
Ask for What You Want
Do you have a reason to believe that
things will be different if you two decide to get back together? If you want
to give the relationship another try, do you honestly believe that you two
can come up with reasonable compromises? You should only consider a
second-time-round only when you sincerely feel that prospects for long-term
happiness together is really there. This is what you need to communicate
to him. Choose a quiet time and place (please…not the bedroom) for the
discussion, one where the two of you can concentrate on each other and put
in words what it is you want, and what it is you can and cannot
tolerate.
Give Him What He Wants
Men show by their actions what they
want and don't want. And sometimes what he wants is his space. Do not try
to force him into a level of commitment he is not ready to be in because
no man was ever happy in a relationship that is forced upon him. Once he
is ready, trust me, he will let you know. But do not ignore the signs that
he cannot "deliver" and offer to hang around just until he is ready because
he may never be ready and you'll have wasted your time in a go-nowhere
relationship.
Keep in mind that relationships follow
the flow of Creation. They are there for as long as they are needed and for
as long as they are necessary for your own spiritual growth. Some relationships
are for ever and others are not. And if you are even doubting if this will
really work out then may be you need to listen to your intuition because
it is telling you something about yourself and about the relationship.
If you’re thinking of getting
back together just to fill the lonely hours until Mr. Right comes along,
you’ll actually reduce the chances of you ever attracting someone who
is right for you. If you want a match that is lasting, you will want a partner
who has worked on his or her own personal development and who has cleaned
up her or his emotional baggage. If you think about it, this person will
want the same of you. Take advantage of the “lonely hours’ to improve
yourself, your career and your life and when you are operating at your best,
someone will come along who will treat you the way you deserve to be
treated.
You deserve a lot more than you are
willing to settle for!!
About the author:
Combining modern and ancient wisdom,
internationally renowned Sexual Confidence and Dating Coach, Christine Akiteng
has helped hundreds rediscover their many untapped and unique deep-down NATURAL
and PRIMAL characteristics that make them incredibly attractive, desired
and valued by the opposite sex. Her sassy, spunky and unique advice on
captivating the opposite sex and creating a fulfilling sexual life combines
self-awareness, a dynamic, free and spontaneous expression of the authentic
self, mystery, spirituality and pure raw sensuality.
Christine's website:
http://www.torontosnumber1datedoctor.com
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Dumped Articles
How To Deal When You've Been
Dumped
Everyone seems to have been through
a broken heart or two. With all the practice, you'd think breakups would
become easier to deal with. Alas, being dumped is one of the crummiest situations
we mere mortals have to surmount.
You've
Been Dumped Part 1
We've all been dumped or have been
the dumpee at once time in our relationship lifetimes. The following article
is a horror story depicting the importance of breaking free if it ever happens
to you.
You've
Been Dumped Part 2 (Continued)
You've patiently waited for it. Hear
it is Part 2 of heartache. Enjoy!
When Sally
Dumped Harry
Co-ownerships of fee simple interests in land.
5 Reasons
Why You Need to Forget Your Ex
Most people take long time to forget
they ex after they have been dumped, divorce or heart broken. Keeping ex
bad memories in your mind will affect other areas of your life.
Advice On How To Cope When Your Loved
One Leaves You
I am sure that we have all been through
the nightmare of been dumped by our boyfriend or girlfriend. At times it
is something that we were expecting, however more often than not it comes
as a big shock. In this situation it is very hard to take, and in this article
I give free tips on how to cope in this situation.
How Soon
Should You Begin Dating After Getting Dumped
This is a very common problem for many
of us. Getting dumped hurts a lot. But one wants to go back to good life
as early as possible, if for nothing than to forget the earlier pain. But
since the pain remains and the thought of being hit again is overwhelming,
it becomes difficult to decide.
The
Joy Of Being Dumped!
Taking the high-road.
How To
Become Rich And Get Dumped
A very good reason to buy the worst
house on the best street for your loved half.
You've Been Dumped - Now
What
Picking up the pieces after a relationships
over. Do this constructively, to have better success next time.
Getting Through A Breakup
Without a doubt, one of the most traumatic and heartbreaking moments
in an adolescent's life is getting broken up with. It can be very tough to
cope with the feelings of rejection that come with being dumped by a loved
one.
How
to Break Up - Successfully
Breaking up is never the easiest thing
to do at the best of times, and depending on how long you have been in the
relationship, will depend on how you go about ending it.
Are You
Being Dumped?
Does it feel like your love interest
is losing interest? What are the signs that the one you want doesn't want
you? Read on to discover seven signs that indicate your partner may be
leaving.
Why Desperate
Housewives + Sex in the City= Edutainment TV Today
How many years of dating, being dumped,
sleeping around, and generally degrading yourself does it take to get a
clue?
You've
Been Dumped! Here's How to Get Over It
Left high and dry by the one you love?
Take action and move on to the happiness you deserve.
Laugh
Your Way to the Bedroom
Ready to be dumped?
The Single Man's Guide On What
To Do If Your Girlfriend Dumps You
It's a sad fact of life, but at some
point in your life you will get dumped by a girlfriend. And, no guy likes
to get dumped, especially by someone you cared for and loved. But, love is
a two-way street. Both parties have to love and nurture a relationship to
keep it alive. It's no good to be involved in a one-way relationship with
a woman that you love and she does not love you back.
The Truth
Behind Divorce & Breakups
Been in a bad relationship? Been cheated on? Been dumped? Don't let it
ruin you. Get help today.
What
to do When You Get Dumped
Break-ups in relationships are never
easy and it's worse when you are the one who gets dumped.
Got a Girlfriend? Here's How Not to
Screw It Up
Having a girlfriend can be a dangerous
thing. We become too dependent on our woman for our happiness, and then if
we get dumped, we find that we've all of a sudden lost our confidence. This
results in being without sex for many months, until we finally get a girlfriend
again, and... the cycle repeats. So to break this cycle, we need to REMAIN
the attractive guy, the alpha male. This article explains how.
3
Reasons Why Inner Game Will Help Your Love Life
Before deciding to get my `mental house`
in order, with respect to relationships, over 2 years ago my inner game was
a mess. A gorgeous, intelligent girl just dumped me, and I even considered
finding any `ole` girl, even if below my standards, and getting married just
dumped me. After all the family had pressuring me anyway. Then I got realistic
and began researching to find out where I went wrong and why I felt so low
a man. Enter Inner Game.
Being
Dumped, Just Plain Sucks!
"Being Dumped" really is one of the
worst experiences, short of death that we, as humans are faced with in our
lives. They say that, death of a loved one is easier to learn to live with,
than a break-up , "Being Dumped" or rejection.
How
to Ease the Pain of a Breakup
Whether you do the dumping or you are the one who got dumped, breakups
are painful. If you initiated the breakup you may feel guilty, or question
that you made the right decision. If you were the one who got dumped you
may feel shocked, hurt, and angry. Breakups are painful for either
party.
How
To Make Hooking Up With Your "Ex" More Thrilling Than It Ever Was
Before!
Now I really have seen everything...
The other day, I saw a television show with a very curious premise: They
found a good-old Southern boy who was such a charmer, 6 of his ex-girlfriends
(some, who had been flat-out "dumped" by him) were willing to line themselves
up in front of a camera for 120 minutes, and go through various and sundry
interviews, to see whether or not they could pass muster with him, the second
time around...
Second
Time Around the Block
Divorce happens. I'm not going to debate
the causes or the moral and ethical implications of that here. Even if you're
the innocent one who stuck to your vows and got dumped anyway, you still
have ...
Sweeten
Up Your Life
Sometimes life experiences can be like
a lemon-flavored Tootsie Roll Pop. Hard and sour on the outside. Soft and
sweet on the inside. Take getting dumped in a relationship for instance.
Facing life a...
Revenge -
Serve It Cold!
Whether you caught him in bed with the local bimbo, dumped him for being
an uncaring twit or he's run off with a woman he met online, you're probably
feeling angry, resentful and wanting revenge. Rev...
How Not
to Get Burned by Your Hot New Flame
This simple formula will tell you if
your super hot new guy is excited about you because he thinks he's met his
soul mate, or if he's merely sexually infatuated with you and will dump you
once he's satisfied his curiosity.
Breaking Relationships with
Women
It is a sad fact of life, but there
will be times when you have to end a relationship. You have to make some
tough choices in life and this is one of them. It's hard to dump someone.
Personally, I'd rather have a root canal.
How
to Dump Your Girlfriend
This week I want to talk about dumping
your girlfriend. Unfortunately a lot of relationships just don't work out.
And if you find yourself in a relationship that is going nowhere, it is best
to end it as quickly as possible. If you are convinced that you have lost
all your feelings for her, whatever you do, don't lead her own and stay in
the relationship just to have someone to be with or for sex.
How
to Decide When to End a Long-term Relationship
Relationships are among of the most
complex aspects of our lives, particularly long-term relationships such as
marriage. Your relationships can elevate you to new heights or drag you down
into the dumps. But what if you’re somewhere in the middle?
8
Valuable tips On How To Survive a Dumping
Unfortunately there is no magic formula
for surviving a dumping. However to find someone you want to spend your life
with, you have to move on and plan a realistic time scale to move forward.
Here's how...
Dumped? Get
Set for a New Life
We've all either been the dumper or
dumpee at some point in our life. The following article will help you mend
yourself and move forward as a better more desirable person.
How I
Got Dumped Via AIM
Larry King once asked Stephen Hawkin
if there was anything about the universe he didn't understand. Hawkin replied
"women". That little anecdote seems to be the foundation of all my relationships
(or lack there of). |
