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How
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ATTRACTION IS EVERYTHING! Here's what to do when you think they are no longer
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 The Dumped dot com articles
Break-up Advice for Men - Don't Leave Like
a Louse!
By Jennifer Brown-Banks
BREAK-UP ETIQUETTE FOR THE
“UNENLIGHTENED” MAN
Imagine this.
Imagine that you report to your job
for what would appear to be a typical work day. From all previous indications,
your employer has been very satisfied with your performance. You arrive early,
get to your office door, and the key won’t fit. It appears that the
lock has been changed. Even worse, you notice your nameplate has been removed
from the door as well. There’s no one around to ask questions. But
it‘s obvious that your worst fear has been realized; you’ve been
fired! And with no warning, no explanation, and no recourse!
Imagine the confusion and the many
unanswered questions this scenario would cause. Imagine the anger and
disappointment. Multiply it by 100 times. That’s a fraction of what
it feels like to a woman you’ve mysteriously dumped!
Let’s face it. Sometimes the
need to sever ties from a former partner happens. “You’ve lost
that lovin’ feeling” or an old flame resurfaces to light your fire.
Or perhaps it’s just irreconcilable differences. And it makes no sense
to stick around and stay miserable. Right? It happens. There’s really
no totally pain free way to move on.
But that doesn’t mean you should
have a callous attitude, or opt for the coward’s way out. Contrary to
the popular song-- there aren’t “50 ways to leave your lover!”
The way you leave a relationship speaks volumes about the type of
“man” you are. It also shapes a woman’s future perceptions
of herself and love in general. Bitter break-ups produce bitter women!
Here’s an online blog entry from
a “woman scorned” that typifies many women’s experiences:
“I’m feeling so rejected, hurt and confused lately. Not a peep
from the jerk. How could I have misread him so? I really thought he was a
stand-up guy. I just don’t understand why every guy I have fallen for
in the past 4 years has pulled practically the same thing.”
Unfortunately, cycles perpetuate.
Peter pays for the sins of Paul. According to John Gray, Ph.D. and author
of Mars and Venus on a Date, “Good endings create good beginnings.”
As someone who has been both the dumper and the dumpee in my relationships,
I can attest, there is an art to ending an affair.
 |
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to Win Back Their Attraction!
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Here’s the “politically
correct” way to pull it off!
¨ DON’T FALL FOR THE GRASS
IS GREENER FALLACY--ASSESS. Before leaving one woman to run to the arms of
another, make sure that what you are risking is worth the tradeoff! Many
times guys find a new love interest enticing just because of the unexplored
pleasures and possibilities. The novelty. After the passage of time and getting
to know the person, they find that what they bargained for is really less
than what they already had. And often too late to do anything to rectify
the situation.
¨ BE SENSITIVE TO HER FEELINGS-
Practice the Golden Rule. Don’t take the easy way out by sending her
an E-mail or leaving a message on her answering machine. It’s really
uncool and unkind. Unless she has a history of violence, do it in person.
Or by a phone call, or a caring, compassionate letter.
¨ IF THERE IS SOMETHING THAT
CAN BE WORKED UPON, TALK IT OUT FIRST. Communication is crucial to any
successful, enduring relationship.
¨ DON’T BASH HER OR BLAME
HER FOR EVERYTHING THAT WENT WRONG. It takes two to make or break a relationship.
¨ HAVE A HEART- If there’s something that you can share in the
way of constructive criticism that might help in the future, then do so.
¨ DON’T OFFER FRIENDSHIP-
At least not right away. It’s offensive, and feels like a demotion.
Unless the two of you started out as friends initially.
¨ KEEP IN MIND A BASIC LAW OF
THE UNIVERSE—What goes around comes around. Karma is a killer!
¨ DON’T KISS AND
TELL—It’s in poor taste, and if it gets back to her, it would only
serve to deepen her pain
¨ DON’T MAKE A MOVE ON HER
BEST FRIEND! For reasons that I hope are obvious.
¨ GIVE HER AN EXPLANATION
THAT’S FAIR AND REASONABLE—Please don’t use the line that
you need to “find yourself” it’s getting old!
¨ DON’T BECOME M.I.A. (Missing
in action)—Many immature and insensitive guys choose this exit strategy.
They simply stop calling or coming around “cold-turkey”, concluding
that a woman will eventually “figure it out”. The terrible thing
about this way of operating, is that it is the worse of all. It never allows
a lover to bring closure to the relationship and heal properly.
Keep in mind that these are general
guidelines. Each situation should be evaluated on an individual basis. For
example, if there is concern that a woman has the potential to become a
“fatal attraction,” you may want to just change your address, go
into seclusion for a while, and forget the above steps! Good luck with
that.
HERE’S HOPING FOR SMOOTHER
TRANSITIONS AND LASTING LOVE!
About the author:
Jennifer Brown Banks is a veteran
freelance writer, and writes a weekly relationship column for Online Dating
Magazine. She is the author of "A Paradox in Pink."
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Dumped Articles
How To Deal When You've Been
Dumped
Everyone seems to have been through
a broken heart or two. With all the practice, you'd think breakups would
become easier to deal with. Alas, being dumped is one of the crummiest situations
we mere mortals have to surmount.
You've
Been Dumped Part 1
We've all been dumped or have been
the dumpee at once time in our relationship lifetimes. The following article
is a horror story depicting the importance of breaking free if it ever happens
to you.
You've
Been Dumped Part 2 (Continued)
You've patiently waited for it. Hear
it is Part 2 of heartache. Enjoy!
When Sally
Dumped Harry
Co-ownerships of fee simple interests in land.
5 Reasons
Why You Need to Forget Your Ex
Most people take long time to forget
they ex after they have been dumped, divorce or heart broken. Keeping ex
bad memories in your mind will affect other areas of your life.
Advice On How To Cope When Your Loved
One Leaves You
I am sure that we have all been through
the nightmare of been dumped by our boyfriend or girlfriend. At times it
is something that we were expecting, however more often than not it comes
as a big shock. In this situation it is very hard to take, and in this article
I give free tips on how to cope in this situation.
How Soon
Should You Begin Dating After Getting Dumped
This is a very common problem for many
of us. Getting dumped hurts a lot. But one wants to go back to good life
as early as possible, if for nothing than to forget the earlier pain. But
since the pain remains and the thought of being hit again is overwhelming,
it becomes difficult to decide.
The
Joy Of Being Dumped!
Taking the high-road.
How To
Become Rich And Get Dumped
A very good reason to buy the worst
house on the best street for your loved half.
You've Been Dumped - Now
What
Picking up the pieces after a relationships
over. Do this constructively, to have better success next time.
Getting Through A Breakup
Without a doubt, one of the most traumatic and heartbreaking moments
in an adolescent's life is getting broken up with. It can be very tough to
cope with the feelings of rejection that come with being dumped by a loved
one.
How
to Break Up - Successfully
Breaking up is never the easiest thing
to do at the best of times, and depending on how long you have been in the
relationship, will depend on how you go about ending it.
Are You
Being Dumped?
Does it feel like your love interest
is losing interest? What are the signs that the one you want doesn't want
you? Read on to discover seven signs that indicate your partner may be
leaving.
Why Desperate
Housewives + Sex in the City= Edutainment TV Today
How many years of dating, being dumped,
sleeping around, and generally degrading yourself does it take to get a
clue?
You've
Been Dumped! Here's How to Get Over It
Left high and dry by the one you love?
Take action and move on to the happiness you deserve.
Laugh
Your Way to the Bedroom
Ready to be dumped?
The Single Man's Guide On What
To Do If Your Girlfriend Dumps You
It's a sad fact of life, but at some
point in your life you will get dumped by a girlfriend. And, no guy likes
to get dumped, especially by someone you cared for and loved. But, love is
a two-way street. Both parties have to love and nurture a relationship to
keep it alive. It's no good to be involved in a one-way relationship with
a woman that you love and she does not love you back.
The Truth
Behind Divorce & Breakups
Been in a bad relationship? Been cheated on? Been dumped? Don't let it
ruin you. Get help today.
What
to do When You Get Dumped
Break-ups in relationships are never
easy and it's worse when you are the one who gets dumped.
Got a Girlfriend? Here's How Not to
Screw It Up
Having a girlfriend can be a dangerous
thing. We become too dependent on our woman for our happiness, and then if
we get dumped, we find that we've all of a sudden lost our confidence. This
results in being without sex for many months, until we finally get a girlfriend
again, and... the cycle repeats. So to break this cycle, we need to REMAIN
the attractive guy, the alpha male. This article explains how.
3
Reasons Why Inner Game Will Help Your Love Life
Before deciding to get my `mental house`
in order, with respect to relationships, over 2 years ago my inner game was
a mess. A gorgeous, intelligent girl just dumped me, and I even considered
finding any `ole` girl, even if below my standards, and getting married just
dumped me. After all the family had pressuring me anyway. Then I got realistic
and began researching to find out where I went wrong and why I felt so low
a man. Enter Inner Game.
Being
Dumped, Just Plain Sucks!
"Being Dumped" really is one of the
worst experiences, short of death that we, as humans are faced with in our
lives. They say that, death of a loved one is easier to learn to live with,
than a break-up , "Being Dumped" or rejection.
How
to Ease the Pain of a Breakup
Whether you do the dumping or you are the one who got dumped, breakups
are painful. If you initiated the breakup you may feel guilty, or question
that you made the right decision. If you were the one who got dumped you
may feel shocked, hurt, and angry. Breakups are painful for either
party.
How
To Make Hooking Up With Your "Ex" More Thrilling Than It Ever Was
Before!
Now I really have seen everything...
The other day, I saw a television show with a very curious premise: They
found a good-old Southern boy who was such a charmer, 6 of his ex-girlfriends
(some, who had been flat-out "dumped" by him) were willing to line themselves
up in front of a camera for 120 minutes, and go through various and sundry
interviews, to see whether or not they could pass muster with him, the second
time around...
Second
Time Around the Block
Divorce happens. I'm not going to debate
the causes or the moral and ethical implications of that here. Even if you're
the innocent one who stuck to your vows and got dumped anyway, you still
have ...
Sweeten
Up Your Life
Sometimes life experiences can be like
a lemon-flavored Tootsie Roll Pop. Hard and sour on the outside. Soft and
sweet on the inside. Take getting dumped in a relationship for instance.
Facing life a...
Revenge -
Serve It Cold!
Whether you caught him in bed with the local bimbo, dumped him for being
an uncaring twit or he's run off with a woman he met online, you're probably
feeling angry, resentful and wanting revenge. Rev...
How Not
to Get Burned by Your Hot New Flame
This simple formula will tell you if
your super hot new guy is excited about you because he thinks he's met his
soul mate, or if he's merely sexually infatuated with you and will dump you
once he's satisfied his curiosity.
Breaking Relationships with
Women
It is a sad fact of life, but there
will be times when you have to end a relationship. You have to make some
tough choices in life and this is one of them. It's hard to dump someone.
Personally, I'd rather have a root canal.
How
to Dump Your Girlfriend
This week I want to talk about dumping
your girlfriend. Unfortunately a lot of relationships just don't work out.
And if you find yourself in a relationship that is going nowhere, it is best
to end it as quickly as possible. If you are convinced that you have lost
all your feelings for her, whatever you do, don't lead her own and stay in
the relationship just to have someone to be with or for sex.
How
to Decide When to End a Long-term Relationship
Relationships are among of the most
complex aspects of our lives, particularly long-term relationships such as
marriage. Your relationships can elevate you to new heights or drag you down
into the dumps. But what if you’re somewhere in the middle?
8
Valuable tips On How To Survive a Dumping
Unfortunately there is no magic formula
for surviving a dumping. However to find someone you want to spend your life
with, you have to move on and plan a realistic time scale to move forward.
Here's how...
Dumped? Get
Set for a New Life
We've all either been the dumper or
dumpee at some point in our life. The following article will help you mend
yourself and move forward as a better more desirable person.
How I
Got Dumped Via AIM
Larry King once asked Stephen Hawkin
if there was anything about the universe he didn't understand. Hawkin replied
"women". That little anecdote seems to be the foundation of all my relationships
(or lack there of). |
